Debjyoti Bardhan
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Since childhood, I have been the skinny one, the weakling among the guys. Fortunately, I was never seriously bullied because of that, but this awareness did lower my self-esteem. It led me into a vicious cycle - because I felt I was too weak to do any serious physical activity, I felt too embarrassed to work out, or even play serious sports. Oh how people would laugh at me when I can't even do what a 10 year old can do! This led me getting weaker and even more embarrassed at my (lack of) any physical ability. I am in academia and have a fairly good track record, so I was (and still am) the typical nerd - way too lean, unable to catch a flying ball, and able to rattle off random facts on random stuff. Only recently, about since half a year when I moved out of my country, did I start taking my fitness seriously. I started to work out at home, since I didn't want to risk exposing myself at the gym. I started running in order to lose flab around my belly. And I felt good! This was the first time in my life when I felt that, despite my lack of musculature, I can be confident. I needn't just be a textbook nerd. Emboldened, i joined the gym - let the guys laugh, I don't care! Surprisingly, I started it enjoying it every single day. It's been just over a couple of weeks and I hit the gym 6 days a week. Yes, I lift weights and do lat pulldowns in front of those buff dudes. I lift far less than they do, but what the heck, this is my journey! And I'm the solo traveller. I wish I had done this earlier. I plan to build muscle. That's the visible tangible part of the whole thing. That's important, true! However, the intangible part is so much more valuable to me.